You are the most wonderful thing that’s come into my life in a long time. As I think you know by now, I love you very much. So it pains me to say this, but I must: I hate your <kind of animal>, <pet name>. <He/She> is always <pet behavior> which I really can’t stand. I’m not much of a <kind of animal> person anyway, and <pet name> really rubs me the wrong way. I know you might take this personally, but I felt it was important that I let you know this now. Let’s talk about how we can solve this problem. I’m sure there’s a way short of euthanasia.